exerpt from my book "reversed"

There is earth around me. Brown like walnuts and black as rich soil caked to my tongue. Bitter- and wet. The callused palm of a hand who feels for my chest, and faded shouts above the hollow grave I have decided to lay buried in. And then I see my rainbow.
It is gentle, veiled in a senseless peace and blossomed with vibrant colors, new and unseen. Glossy shades of heavenly pastels with gleaming edges, rays of color spectrums that dance across my eyelids. So many people believe in light, airy winds of mighty hands that lay across the small of your back, ushering to move you up flight one of the golden staircase at the peak of marshmallow clouds. But I see a blend of blinding white dawn, and I turn myself over the wheel of the Nissan. The rainbow is gone.
In its place lies the lackluster of light. Foreign and uneasy, with a dark pitched claw that fingers the sides of my face and caresses the bone of my cheek. I cry out, reaching for audible, and the blue suits peer in through the dirt crusted opening. “Get me out of here!” I shriek with raspy breaths low moans. The fingers inch across my jaw line and the whispers begin, joined by a single, firm harmonic voice.
“Fires are the comforts in the wake of death! You have led nothing, done nothing, grime under fingernails spells the train of your footprints! The dark is a refuge, I am the refuge, wallows and cries I shelter; For at the peak of death my fingers draw you in, and I smile.” The nails sear the flesh against my nostrils.
“OUT! By heavens grace you worship angel, kicked from my gates I undermine all authority. OUT! You husband of evildoers, wicked soul and sin instiller. OUT!”
The fingers attached like suction cups are torn from bleeding flesh and relinquished. From the opening that showers dirt upon my brows, beacons will the black mass crevices.
“For where there are broken spirits, my touch restores all life. For those whose hearts are hardened, the fathers hand of nurture softens the bruises and bloody tissue. OUT! You futile demon! The scars of the generations ache in turmoil; dirt unearthed to seal the tombs of dying souls. I bring forth my warrior and wake her from prisons chambers. Be it known that when the dead arise and work the vineyards of servanthood for glorys namesake, my people shall recognize the name of the Lord.”

"reversed"

So exams are over. I'm so stoked that I have a new semester to begin! all i wanted was for the stress to go POOOF! you can obviously see my joy in the picture. I am currently hosting and helping to run a lifegroup at my house on Monday nights, and we are in the middle of an astounding project. quote" church? where the poor people go to eat?" WOW! HAHA mikela colon. anyways, i am currently writing my novel, "reverse/reversed" and researching literary agents. i have recieved on email from a literary agent in New York, regarding my submission of my manuscript. He now knows I am only sixteen. But his email suggests he wouldnt mind representing me if my material is good! my dream, though, is writershouse. They have represented the biggest hits: twilight,nora roberts, junie B jones, etc. i'll let you know... the literary world is a rush.

Exams, Exams. Why art though so stressful?

1st semester exams are tuesday through Friday of next week. I am running around ragged trying to study and balance all of my time! I am aiming for straight A's on all exams, ( hard goal, i know ) and if i dont get it, i will be VERY dissapointed. Not the end of the world, but STILL. look at me :
now, the classes are fair. I will definitely do well on my english 2 honors exam. we all know that ;) for Agriculture communications ( my journalism class ) i should pretty much ace it. that class can be accomplished with a blindfold. spanish 2 = im looking at a decently easy or barely difficult exam. i see about.... a high B or a low A. maybe higher. im aiming for the A! as far as aglebra two honors- dear heavenly father- i need your help and provision!!!! my poor little calculator will blow up. chemesitry honors- should be decent. in the middle between medium difficulty and okay. lets see where that takes me. AP world history: may i recieve sweet miracles from heaven. hardest exam. like, ever. and debate 1- so easy i couldnt miss like, ANY answers. go OO's! heres a look at my AP stress level... see above picture.

fishers of men in 2010

I have neglected this place for a year. And in that year, I have transformed radically.
i am no longer the Mckinzie I have hidden behind, but the Mckinzie who has been defined by God. The mirror has been shattered with the remains of a past life, and beautiful beginnings peak from promises of hope and transformation. New about me:
1) Sophomore. Brandon High School.
2) saved and redeemed by my king.
3) following eagerly and hungry for more, in HIM.
4) found my calling, my passion. my future- writing.
5) chasing AFTER that calling.
6) Member of the Crossing church. emerge attendee
7) Ambassador/student leader at the Crossing church.
8) Still best friends with Mikela Colon and Jordan Barrett
9) Made new and refreshing friendships to replenish those that have died.
10)conquered the OCD, thoughts, pills, and the therapy. praise HIM.
11)babysitter and adopted daughter to Barbara Elliott. needs to keep in better touch
with Corrie Hillary.
12)small group: Daddy's little girls. small group: Brandon High School
13)straight A's. whoa.
no permit, no license. epic fail.
14)ready for 2010

2010 has entered and I am ready to prepare the way. My relationship with God, other's relationships, and my destiny. Fishers of men in 2010. seeking new opportunities, dreams, and miracles, and entering in with a smile and determination.

Clare Bear

I saw the infamous Clare! After my dad picked me up I never stopped smiling. That little girl is too precious for words to explain. Lots of drool :) And Mrs. Hillary is doing fabulous. Its so amazing to watch how she interacts with Clare. The bond they have is so beautiful. Mrs. Hillary is such a good momma!I saw her tickling her, blowing on her, kissing and hugging her... and Clare is getting to that separation anxiety stage. lol. But seeing Clare and Mrs. Hillary was by far the highlight of my day. I missed Mrs. Hillary SO MUCH!

start blogging more!!

im taking a stand with mikela!! im gonna start blogging more!! ok so lately- UGH. u guys kno why. however.... i love the spicy Goddess of the car!! lol well tomorrow is the poetry jam and i think that im overly excited. i really hope i win. lets see- so I recieved brilliance back. that was pretty awesome. i feel like im already famous. well- emerge is probably the most exciting thing for me lately. totally amazing!! ahaha and my slumber party... that was unforgetable.shooting stars, creepy men walking, and annoying seniors with megaphones. wait! dont forget the marshmallows!! and ....yes, we all know.... MARK! We're going BOWLING with him tomorrow!! wait...... we're "not" not going bowling tomorrow. i think- is that right? lol im so confused guys. ily

crazy weeks of fun

these are some awesome events that have happened lately:
1) started christmas shopping 2)going to emerge and the sanctuary at the crossing 3) Ive written tons of poetry 4) school school school 5) recieved some of my birthday presents : Jonas brother poster, tote bag, and a twilight shirt. 6) ordered 3 twloha shirts 7) payed a visit to Mann 8) bowling 9) halloween wedding 10) Novemberfest

its begun

I think most of you know that one of my goals in high school is to publish my first book before my graduation. For me, it takes a lot of planning. and stress, and vocab words from Mrs. P. But I believe I have finally found the right topic to start writing about.
Today after school i was on my testriffic account and was in the mood to write a short story. Ironically enough, I remembered meeting Alane Ferguson last week. it inspired me once again. So i went on Word and started typing away.
I believe I have found the one subject I know will satisfy me. How? Because when I started, I didnt want to stop. Ideas kept flowing and it was amazing! And I can tell that the book-to-be would end up popular in the young adult genre.
So friends-family, Ive started! I'm not going to leak any hints about the contents, because that would ruin the fun! So give me the time span. and im dedicating it to all of you. Oh, and courtney- you too. :) Your DEFINITELY included lol

converse is helping

To write Love on her Arms.

Its been on Mikela's blog and on Jordan's blog, so why not on mine? Ive become officially "obsessed."
I read the transcript for the first time and it truly moved me. After looking in depth to it, I realized that it was something i was going to get hooked on. Because the world can seem so down on you sometimes, and you might feel like theres no esacape, but the Love of others and the Love of God and Jesus Christ is always the answer. No matter what you've done, and no matter what you've been through, your are and will always be loved.
Its really sad when you start the story. How she locked herself in the bathroom and cut those curse words into her arm. and how no one would except her because it was too risky. That probably made her feel even worse. Whats worse than the feeling of not being wanted? By God, or by anyone? And whats worse than having to go through that, to the point where you resort to hurting yourself?
Although it starts off horribly, it closes with more beauty than I can imagine. She was truly healed, for the most part, at least. Because with the help of those that loved her, she was able to get a hold on her life and piece it back together. You cant enjoy the riches of life If you dont learn to love yourself first.
So as I close this blog entry, lets make it kinda fun. we should do a chain. Colby got Jordan hooked, and Jordan shared it with Mikela and I, who got hooked as well. So if you want to see what this movement is all about, I'm passing it on to you. Check out the story. It will change your perspective on a lot of things in life. Its an absolute beautiful piece of work, and I know that it will only get bigger. So TAG! Your it! and remember:
Love is the movement.
To write Love on her arms.

appreciate

guys: this is a rare jonas brothers song.
they wrote it, but they didnt sing it. its on nicks private almbum tho. its amazing.http://view.playlist.com/12611456267

nature valley in blonde hair

hahaha ^^ above title.

ok so today was just blah. u know- stupid mondays. the part that brightened up my day was seeing courtney. i screamed with joy :) so in first period we ran in the freezing cold and my friends chest kinda froze up and she nearly passed out. colby was a trooper tho ;) him and i ran at the same pace for EVER!!! and then i tripped. way to go me. in 2nd period i met alane ferguson and we personally discussed my writing. that was another highlight of the day. she inspired me. in 3rd period it was just hectic with workbook pgs blah blah... and in 4th period- mr. johnson and I had a debate about the jonas brothers. and for the first time in my life... I WON!!! yayy ;) Cody is still "my friend" in 5th period. but im pretty p'od at him. stop feeling me!!! Ugh. i have a ring and u better watch it!! in 6th... hahaha nature valley in camerons hair. i can explain... for some reason i got really mad at him becuz i remembered the whole week he chanted bloody mary, so i dumped my nature valley crumbs all over his hair. i should have done it in wesleys tho. however, it would have gotten stuck. in 7th, we passed around the most HILARIOUS NOTE! HA!! and in 8th... yeah. nothing. so that was my day in a nutshell. i wrote a new poem called Homecoming. you guys should read it.

trick or treat

went to trick or treat street with michelle [first friend i ever had] known her since i was two and she was born ( becuz shes one year younger than i am ) but my best friends now: jordan, Mikela, Morgan, Bailey, and Courtney- they are my favorite, and the ones i can never replace, no matter what happens. dude- when we all die- we're gonna be buried next to each other lol. ok so yeah. michelle and I passed out candy to the little kids. this years turnout wasnt as great as the previous years. however, that one pirate dude scared the begeezees out of me. we also won some fish. well, I won them. i threw a ping pong ball into a bowl :]. and yes, i actually made it. so i won three fish in the same bag, because they were all pretty small. michelle and I promised to split them. and since she's such a dork, she wanted to name them all Fabio. so she has two of them, nd I have the runt. we also went to Sonic last night and to walmart. it was fun. heres a shocker tho. Michelle just recently started cheering for the bears. yeah, everyone. James's team. and she knows him. so michelle was calling him and texting him last night, although i told her that he wouldnt answer, because he knows its from my phone. and i was right. wow- james gonna be a little ticked off at me on monday. well, MORE ticked off. but hey, i warned Michelle. James wont answer. so what else has happened lately? um... courtney i miss you like crazy. like- i would kill somebody to go and visit you. ok not really, but you get my point :] lol. wow. Nala is crashed out on my bed right now. head turned up and paws curled around her tail. its adorable. um- i think aaron is jealous of our fish naming skills. or should i say- mr fishy is. because he was the fish that got stuck witht he owner who doesnt know how to name a fish. lol. ok well- ima go do something. homework maybe? yay.

the friends know...

the friends know what James did.
oh well.
let it happen.
give me a while.
so...
the nine weeks are over. wahoo! wow it was hard...
but i got straight A's.

"Bully Rights"

remember that witch, bellina? well take her, and then add on TJ Malone, Angelo Rivera, Mitchell Young, and you get the bullies of 2nd period.
are you wondering what happened?
naturally, those idiots talked the whole entire class time today while we were reading, and I didnt understand any part of the story because i couldnt concentrate. I screamed shut up about 12 times. they just dont get it. and then when its my turn to read, angelo starts his bloody mary chant again. and then those others follow along. i was seriously annoyed. i started to get a little temper going on, but mostly because i wanted to do my work and all i heard was either noises or bloody mary stuff. and im always seeing bellina making fun of me out of the corner of my eye. I finally just took a sigh, and told mrs hutches i was going to the bathroom. as i got up, Bellina said " dont turn off the lights " ... i grabbed my pass and practically slammed the door and raced down the hallway. I wasnt in a good mood today.
apparently, as i learned later on today, Mrs hutches read them the bully rights. she wasnt tolerating bullying in her classroom. when i had come back into the classroom, the whole class was silent and everyone knew not to mess with me. I needed one of those squeeze balls. I was cussing and making hand gestures and i normally dont do that unless someone reallllyyyy gets under my skin. I dont think ive ever behaved so badly in a classroom then i did today.
I felt really bad all day, so I went and apologized to mrs hutches after school ended. she told me that she was not angry, and that she was proud of me for doing the right thing. it was the best idea to just excuse myself from the classroom like i did. so that was the drama of today. I swear, I almost punched bellina. If it wasnt more mrs hutches there, i probably would have gone up and spit in her face. ( jk. i have self control ) but i would of acted irrationally.
If theres anything ive learned today, its to pay no attention to those that disturb you. I am responsible for what i do and say. Just because those kids annoyed the crap outa me, i should try to stay calm and collective. I am my own person, and i decide who will get to me. and ive made that decision. no one will.

i like this survey...

A halloweeny survery

So do you remember what your very first costume was?: witch or princess.
Why do those packs of just 2 Starbursts taste better than a whole pack: becuz u want the flavor to last.... and people spit on them. UGH
Have you ever egged a house on cabage night?: NO! im not THAT rude.
Do you like the smell of pumpkin guts?: lmao. yeah
How old were you when you stopped trick or treating?: im stopping this year
(or how old WILL you be when you do stop): see above answer
As a kid did you watch Charlie Browns holloween special every year?: nope.
Do you like candy corn?: omg that crap rox!
Whats the best costume you ever wore?: renassiance queen
Do you like watching scary movies on halloween?: hahah..... SHUT UP FRIENDS
Ever notice how Halloween night always has that smokey smell outside?: actually i have. wat a wierd observation
Are you a big fan of the houses that give out cans of soda?: no. cant they give out water?? its alot better
Whats the best thing you ever got from a house?: the finger. no haha sorry. umm ask morgan. she'd know
Have you ever been so scared on Halloween you cried?: this guy threatened me with a snake....
What do you do with the stuff you get that you dont like?: give it to Morgan or others
Have you ever been chased by a dog on Halloween?: once again. ask morgan.
Who do you ususally go trick or treating with?: omg. such a stupid question. see the last 3 questions
Have you ever smashed someone elses pumpkins?: :0 no!
Do you like the band Smashing Pumpkins?: theres a band? what has this world come to?
Do you remember elementary school feild trips to the pumpkin patch?: every single flippin skewl i attend is too poor
Have you ever hid behind bushes to jump out and scare little kids?: not little ones...
Whats the best haloween candy?: reesees or um.... ask morgan
Have you ever eaten so much candy you got sick?: nope.
Do you remember comparing who got the most candy with your friends?: yup. morgan wins
If we're not suppose to take candy from strangers why do we on Halloween?: cuz halloween falls on the same day as opposite day. ;p
Have you ever had a bat in your house?: nope. and this suvey is kinda wierd.
If so did you name it Pablo?: nope. id name it bailey.
Has anyone ever trashed your house on Halloween?: not mine.... the house next to jordans tho yeah
Is there some one you really wish would get their house egged?: ohhh yeah!!! ok lemme name them: alexis paul, bellina, james, jarett epps, coach goff, shhh..baiza. um zack barnes cuz he'd go crazy... jk. id get punched.
Whats the coolest jack-o-lantern carving you ever saw?: pshhh.... the day someone carves the jonas brothers im sold
Whats grosser Almond Joy or Mary Janes?: ALMOND JOY.
What did you go as last year, if anything?: it was a thrown together kinda costume
Did you used to hate having school the morning after Halloween?: yeah.
Did you ever take a sheet and go as a "ghost": no but i want to.
What was the most original thing you ever went as?: witch.
Whats the creepiest costume you ever saw someone wear?: lets not go there.
Do you like the lady that gives out apples every year?: worms attck me when i give the apple to morgan...
Have you ever gotten a rock?: oh yeah. lemme tell ya about it
What do you think of the house that turns the lights out and gives no candy: johovo witnesses. no wait. ummm---- they were stolen by the bacon fairy
Did you love hearing scary ghost stories as a kid?: NO NO NO NO NO NO

Fill out this survey yourself
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your daily dose of kinzie

to measure my day: i give it an 8
everyone annoyed the crap outa me at lunch. u kno who u are.
david got signed out. him and ryan pulled a scare concerning friday!! :0
Jenna and Betsy hung out and we played some volleyball.
rat woman gave me an A+ on my booksellers project- i earned 2nd place with $70!!!
it was fun joshin with Nick in 4th period. SOB/NOB lmao
i dont like mrs williams
im starving right now!
i made a fool out of myself in 1st period concerning, well, you know...
lol Mrs. Hall always cheers up my day.
cody ( the gay one ) is talking to me again.
Azia needs to crawl in a hole.
Aaron wasnt here... no more boot!
mrs B gave me gum. yum.
yeahh my ghost joke didnt seem to be funny....
Drama with Devyn, Jeff, and Amber...
i still hate bellina
and Mrs. Hutches is still overstimulated....

New interest: comment!!!

ok- i am giving this some serious thought- and I want you guys to honestly tell me what you think. Every day in Hope I play volleyball- I think i have some potential. my moms friend's dad is a coach, and eat, sleeps, and breathes volleyball. Tracy told him that I have potential for an excellent volleyball player, and so he wants to meet me. So- we agreed that together, her and her dad could coach me. Her dad is tough- and Tracy said he can have in me Varsity by the beginning of my sophomore year, and I'd be rockin at it. I am finding volleyball to be extremely fun, and I dont suck at all. I can still play basketball, since the two sports are in different seasons. so should i carry on?

no title deal with it

hola yo! ok. first thing i have to say. happy b-day dale jr. i kno im an anti-fan, but hey, I have to be somewhat civil. Adding to this tragedy, I almost got suspended today for something i had PERMISSION to do. most of you guys know the story. mikela is on homecoming court!!! yayayy her!! I go dress shopping on Sunday for my homecoming dress. well i just got back from the Newsome-Brandon game with Morgan. Jack didnt play- he tore his aretna and has lazer eye surgery. OW!! i texted sherry throughout the game, and we texted tyler N. I really need to go bowling tomorrow. I need to see if David is ok. he had a panic attack in 3rd period after the "almost suspension" and nearly passed out. I have to keep checking up on him. poor david...

Wicked witch of the swim team

You know those movies where the witch always gets, like, killed or something by a huge house or whatever? oh wait. haha. DUH! wizard of Oz!! ok- well mikela- u know bellina in avid 1st period? yeah, lets team up, throw some striped stockings on those diseased legs, and attach a wart to match her ugly attitude. bellina is my wicked witch. " Ding Dong I hate the wicked witch! " so get this. there is only one other person in my life who has made me so mad as to where I cant be in their presence, and that is some kid from mann that I cant remember. Well, Bellina now shares that position. Is is so wrong that I like the Jonas Brothers? Is it so wrong that I want to help fight diabetes because a lot of people i know have it? and is it so wrong for me siimply turn around to talk to a friend, while i ( unconciously ) lay my elbow on the corner of her desk and she cusses me out? paranoia: its a horrible thing. I swear. I turn around to talk to laura every once in a while in 2nd period, and without thinking about it, i sometimes touch her binder or simply put my elbow on her desk. she flips out. today, she was sleeping in class, and I was extremely sick from almost throwing up in 1st period because of my cold. As i was coughing and in the puking position, I accidentally jerked backwards as I coughed up some you-know-what. and suddenly, I'm the b-word? and then she calls me some kind of fat-comment, and mikela, should she even be talking? I mean for the love of God and all things he has blessed us with!! On thursday last week, she went on some kind of thunder thighs rant. HELLO! I'm not fricken Brittany or Jonathan!! Oh my god i want to pull my hair out! I was making an announcement about our next diabetes event- and she says for the whole class to hear: oh shes only doing it for those **** jonas brothers. UGH!!!! i am NOT!and you know what gets me? I'll say one thing- about anything. I may bring up something about what happened over the weekend to my friend laura- and she dishes it in some way. and this is how you know im mad. Mrs Hutches is in the room, and everyone is looking at me. Aware of this, when she turns around, I give her the bird and cuss under my breath. I DONT USUALLY DO THAT!Ugh guys i really cant handle it. the things she does to me are more worse than how i can describe it on this blog. the witch is like- a demon from the underworld. maybe she should hang with alezis paul- allthough alexis would probably exclude her seeing as how bellina doesnt fit her standards. so i asked to move seats today. I wanna punch her in her good for nothing face. oh wait. i put that wrong. I currently sit right in front of her- but now im moving to where she used to sit. and heres the thing. ive been sitting in my seat ever since kate got switched out. and then one day, bellina decides to move over to my side. and she COMPLAINS> HELLO beast!!! Go back where you were before!!! But NOO. i end up having to move away from my friends, all for the sake so I dont punch her in the gut during XL one day. I dont think you guys have ever seen me this mad b4. I think she has some kinda like anger issues and she needs to go see a fricken guidsance counselor. so belline: I hope a house falls on you. the end.